Matthew 5:39 states: "But I say unto you, That ye resist not evil: but whosoever shall smite thee on thy right cheek, turn to him the other also." I want to live my life positively and know that when I go to the Lord in prayer I do so with a good heart. I want to be an example not only to Caleb, but to anyone I come into contact with. There is a person in my life that I must come into contact with on a regular basis. I honestly believe this individual is one of the most negative people I have ever encountered. In immaturity and ignorance, we have clashed on more than one occasion. I am by all means ashamed that I could not be a more patient person in the past. As I have grown and matured through the past couple of years, I have put forth a lot of effort to make my relationship with this person be peaceful. It has taken a lot of work and I have practiced the priciple of turning the other cheek. Sadly, the peace has ended and we are not seeing eye to eye on some things. While this person is putting a lot of energy into ignoring me and casually getting jabs in, I am putting forth everything I have to stay positive and upbeat. As you can imagine, it's a difficult combination. My struggle today is keeping strength to keep doing what I'm doing. Silently I have wondered and asked God why my efforts are not paying off. I have prayed intensely that I have the ability to bring peace to the situation. I understand that God does things in His own time, but I am left wondering how much longer I can hold on to my hope and well-intentioned efforts.
I read an article pertaining to turning the other cheek on Growing Christians and was encouraged by the following paragraph:
"We see, then, that when interpreted properly the 'impossible' commands of Matthew 5:38-42 are possible. Possible, however, does not mean easy. Many times the obedient Christian will be "stepped on" and yet we are called to "take it" rather than retaliate. When someone takes advantage of us or insults us or talks behind our back or excludes us we are to 'turn the other cheek' and not retaliate. It may hurt us , cost us, inconvenience us , or exhaust us. There will always be those borderline cases where we must make decisions--sometimes very painful. But even in those situations which are not strictly 'turn the other cheek' cases, remember that mercy has always been God's rule of thumb."
I feel as if my faith is being tested at the moment. I know that God does everything for a reason, but I can't help but wonder what I am supposed to learn from this. I feel like I'm just not "geting it". I've searched my heart today to see if maybe I am harboring some type of ill feelings towards this person. To some degree, I am mostly frustrated. I do feel compassion for this individual. I know that they have had a tough life and their actions are directly influenced by years of abuse and sadness. This person has been a victim of parental and marital abuse time after time and it has formed them into a defensive, judgemental, and derogatory person. No matter how I try I do realize that I will never be able to influence a change in this person. There are some wounds so deep that only God can repair them. I have to accept that. All I can do is pray for this person to have peace and find some sort of resolution for the wrongs that have been done to her. My mom (in all of her calm reason) reminded me of that this morning. This whole time I have been praying for myself to have patience and strength while I should have been praying for the other person's issues as well. Now that I have typed that, I do feel a little selfish.
If you happen to stop by and read my blog and you're the praying type, please keep my situation (and all people in involved) in your prayers. I'm typically not one to share my problems with just anyone, but I could use all of the help I can get right now. I would love your support, kindness, and well wishes in this matter! I am so grateful in advance to everyone that sends prayers and advice!