As Caleb got older and started getting a lot more active, I began to notice things.
I had a ton of pictures of my husband and little boy doing things together.
I wasn't in a lot of those pictures.
And those that I was in, I was completely disgusted with the way I looked.
Still I focused on Caleb. As months went by, I noticed more.
I spent more time focused on my son than I was focused on my husband.
I was really struggling with my health.
And I spent a lot of time watching my husband and child do things.
I tuned all of that out. I thought as long as my son was happy, healthy and thriving I was doing my job as a mom.
Turns out, I was absolutely wrong.
I was sitting on the sidelines of our life. I was watching my child grow up. I wasn't participating like my husband got to. Reality started hitting me right in the face.
I was hiding behind a camera. I was hiding behind health problems. I made excuse after excuse as to why I couldn't have a more active, happier role in our family.
I was miserable.
I decided I was done with living an unhealthier, heavier life. I have not looked back because the results far outweigh the effort I have put into this journey.
- I can play in the tubes of the McDonald's play area. I was the one who showed Caleb how to go through when he was terrified. Yes, I climbed my behind right through them. I would have never tried that before.
- My husband and I flirt with each other so much more. He compliments everything about me because he knows just how much I have put into this.
- I am ten times happier and calmer now. My boys love that about me. :)
- My husband and I do life together now. My health problems are resolved and I have the confidence to tackle anything with him.
- My butt fits on the amusement park rides and swings. My size does not define what I can or cannot do anymore. I am free!
I'm here to tell you, all of that does not come back overnight. My journey isn't just about weight loss. It's so much more than that.
Is Caleb lacking anything? No, not at all. He got a mother who can enjoy life with him. I should have done this sooner.